Executive Director's Blog

Nov 27, 2012

Understanding Conflict in the Workplace


Effective communication is such an essential part of our everyday lives. Every person we encounter throughout our day and every relationship we build is shaped by the way we communicate. Especially in the workplace, it is important to express your ideas in such a way that they are understood by a wide range of personalities. We must also remember that conflict and difference of opinion are natural occurrences, and when dealt with in the appropriate way, they can actually enhance our work relationships.

When dealing with difficult supervisors or co-workers, knowing how to express your disagreement with someone without being disagreeable is a very important concept. Conflict is difficult in any relationship, but it often develops from unrealistic expectations. View your workplace as a melting pot of ideas, cultures and personalities. If you remember that each person’s experiences and personal history are different, your expectations will be more in line with a typical working environment.

When you are interviewing, pay attention to the culture of the workplace, and determine if it is a place you see yourself fitting into. Decide what type of environment is healthy for you, and contemplate what type of culture will help you to thrive. This is a very important part of the interview process for you, as you observe potential co-workers and supervisors to determine if a particular workplace will enable you to succeed.

Because we are an instant society, we also tend to have unrealistic expectations when we initially establish relationships. We can have everything at our fingertips in a moment: fast food meals, information, and communication using our smartphones. We often forget the natural evolution of a relationship.

As a new employee coming into an established relationship, we sometimes expect the same to be reciprocated right away, and we forget the work it takes to build an ongoing rapport with someone. If you are expecting more from a co-worker or supervisor than what they are ready for, it is going to be uncomfortable. You do not need to force anything. As long as you go to work, do your job and act professionally, these relationships will happen. Just do not expect too much too soon.

Here are a few things to remember when evaluating workplace culture and establishing relationships:
  • Go in with realistic expectations. We all express different ideas, opinions and personalities. Embrace the melting pot.
  • Pay attention to workplace culture. Determine if it would be a healthy place for you.
  • Relationships take time to build. You will establish bonds, it just won’t happen right away. 
  • You can express disagreement without being disagreeable.
  • Conflict is natural. Your reaction and how you handle conflicts is important in reaching a solution.
New Directions Career Center is here to help you enhance your working relationships. Our programs are designed to help you effectively manage conflict through career guidance, attitude control and effective communication tools. Our 21-day New Directions class, exclusively for women, features a segment on assertive communication and conflict management.